This little boy? When he first arrived at our front door just over two years ago, he was this little ball of anger and frustration. It was so hard. I kissed him and hugged him and worked hard to make him feel at home. I was committed to him, but I lived for nap time and bed time. When it became apparent that he wasn’t going to get to go home, I cried out in prayer one day, “Lord, please don’t just help me get through each day. Please make me fall in love with him.” And God answered that prayer. Today, when I kiss him good-bye before preschool and say, “I love you,” I mean it with every fiber of my being. I can’t imagine life without him. That’s a scary thing in this world of foster care because anything can happen at any time, but it’s a risk worth taking.
This is so wonderful. My son is in a special ed intervention classroom, although he “pushes out” to the mainstream kindergarten class for half the day, with an aide. (He’s a high-functioning autistic.) The intervention program is for K-6 students, split into a primary grades class and a secondary grades class, who have behavioral and/or social delays/impairments (no major cognitive delays/impairments). There are some kids that wrestle with anger and aggression and my heart breaks for them. For a child to feel that disintegrated inside, to have to communicate in that manner because they are still learning more effective ways, it must be overwhelming and frightening.
I think of Ross Greene, author of The Explosive Child as well as other fantastic books, who says all behavior is communication and that kids do well when the can. Without learning how to communicate and behave effectively, they can’t do well.
You are amazing to love this little boy right where he is, not trying to force him into compliance. With that sort of patience and love, and the right support and resources, he can thrive!
God bless your soul!